Gareth Bale has been ruled out for 6 to 8 weeks after a scan by the Spurs medical staff revealed a fractured imagination. It’s the latest in a string of injury setbacks for the Welsh attacker.


“The news is bad,” José Mourinho told Soccer on Sunday. “We were hoping maybe a hamstring, but the imagination is more difficult to treat. I asked Gareth if he might try imagining a cure, but he says that he can only imagine injuries and playing golf. So the situation is difficult.”

“The imagination is complex,” said Mourinho. “For example, I imagined last night that I packed Gareth off back to Madrid, but the cunt is still here. So the power of imagination has limits.”

“I miss Pogba,” he added.