Emery and Bruce

Newcastle have made contact with Steve Bruce about a possible shock return to the helm at St James’ Park. Unai Emery is the latest manager to turn down the position since Bruce was sacked last month.



“Very surprised,” Bruce told Soccer on Sunday. “When Amanda rang this morning and asked if I’d come back, I spat my Rice Krispies all over my onesie. ‘Well, well, well, you dozy blonde shitebag’, I said. Probably I’m not proud of speaking to a lady that way, but she’s tough as an old forklift, Amanda.”

“Will I come back?” said the 60 year-old. “Only if I receive an individual apology from all 30,000 season ticket holders — or as I call them, season ticket cunts.”

“But yes, it’s an opportunity that excites me,” he added.