Ferguson and Khabib

As transcribed by Sky Sports.

Khabib: Hello.

Ferguson: Whiskey, neat. And KP ready-salted nuts.

Khabib: No, I don’t work here. I’m a former UFC champion.

Ferguson: What the fuck is a KFC champion? Did you win an eating competition?

Khabib: Not KFC, UFC. Mixed Martial Arts?

Ferguson: Load of shite, all that Kung-fu nonsense. Eric Cantona was able to figure it out in midair back in 1995.

Khabib: Em…ok. Did you enjoy the game?

Ferguson: Did I fuck. Ole put Cristiano on the bench, the wee Scandinavian shitebag. I’ll be doing a Cantona on him myself when he pops his head in.

Khabib: Well, nice to meet you Sir Alex.

Ferguson: Remember, neat, and ready-salted. None of that dry-roasted shite.