Pep Guardiola has signed a new two year deal with Manchester City that will keep him at The Etihad until 2023. The Catalan coach sported a lush head of hair during the signing.
“A transplant?” said Guardiola. “How dare you. I grow my hair and slap in a little Brylcreem, and you accuse me of being bald? Where is the respect? Could a bald man win the Premier League twice? The Champions League twice? Of course not.”
“Do you ask Arteta if his hair is real?” he said. “I do not like to accuse others, but Mikel looks like a lego man. Something’s not right there, but as I say, I do not like to talk about other managers’ hair.”
“Does anybody have any questions that aren’t about my hair?” added Guardiola. “No? Right. I’m off to buy skinny jeans online.”