Pep at Anfield

Pep Guardiola is refusing to leave Anfield 2 days after the Premier League champions secured a 2 – 2 draw against Liverpool. The 50 year-old continues to appeal for a second yellow card for James Milner.


“It’s a fucking yellow,” screamed Guardiola at the space where 4th official Mike Dean had stood on Sunday. “You cheating fucking bastards. Oh, the injustice — now I know how Nelson Mandela felt. I pray for all your deaths, you spineless cock-sucking whistle-nerds.”

“Milner has to go,” bellowed the former Barcelona boss onto the pitch where referee Paul Tierney had kept his card in his pocket several days previous. “A curse on you Tierney, and to a lesser extent your linesmen. A pox on all your houses from now until the end of time. I will fornicate with your wives and shit on your graves.”

“I cannot say more,” he added. “Or I will be fined, no?”