Hull City have announced that they will be known as Hull Mooses from the 2017 season on. The East Yorkshire club failed in their 2013 bid to become Hull Tigers, but the FA have voted 6 to 1 in favour of this latest application.
Owner Assem Allam is delighted with the ruling.
“The moose symbolises everything good about Hull,” the Egyptian told Soccer on Sunday. “Powerful, majestic creatures with enormous penises. At full gallop they can outrun a Ford Cortina over 50 yards. Just like Tom Huddlestone.”
“We’re still fine-tuning the name,” he added. “Technically moose is the plural of moose. So we could be Hull Moose. But that sounds like a typo, so the marketing guys want Hull Mooses. Personally? I’m tempted to go with Hull Meese. You know, like geese?”
“Moose, meese, it’s all the same to me,” manager Steve Bruce told Soccer on Sunday. “My job is to make Hull Moose a force to be reckoned with. Teams will know they can’t mess with the moose. The moose will make the most of their misses, and mash them.”
“Did you know a pair of meese can drag a Ford Escort 100 yards up a hill?” he added. “Just like Tom Huddlestone.”
Supporters’ groups have vowed to fight the name change, just as they did in 2013.
“We’re Hull City forever,” season ticket holder Paul Moran told Soccer on Sunday. “I don’t care how many Ford Pintos a flock of mooses can beat in a tug-of-war. Leave our name alone.”