Jadon Sancho has signed for Manchester City on a five-year deal worth a reported £110 Million, and £350k per-week in salary. UTD had been favourites to sign the highly-rated 20 year-old before being gazumped by their Manchester rivals.
“I’m so happy,” Pep Guardiola told Soccer on Sunday. “With those UEFA cunts back in their box, we are free to spray spondoolicks around again, no? Who cares if Jadon even plays? I just love to splurge. If I had to choose coaching or splurging, I would choose splurging every time.”
“Does anybody know which position Jadon plays?” said the Catalan boss. “Probably I should have YouTubed him. Please God he is a mobile, ball-playing centre-half. You can never have too many of those.”
“Someone get me Neymar’s phone number,” added Guardiola. “I’m splurging.”