Messi

Barcelona insist that they still have not received Lionel Messi’s faxed transfer request due to a paper jam on their side. The Argentinian is believed to have made several attempts to re-fax the document.

Fax

“It’s frustrating,” Messi told Soccer on Sunday. “The Faxmaster 2000 is a solid machine, but not if you load A3 paper into the A4 slot. That’s asking for trouble. Are the club deliberately loading paper arseways to stop me leaving? I wouldn’t put it past that Bartomeu cunt.”

“I’ll keep faxing,” said the 6 time Ballon d’Or winner. “Although there seems to be a paper jam on my side now too. Not sure how that happened. Does anyone have a manual for a Cannon Faxtron 3000?”

“Someone fax my agent and ask him to fax me,” added Messi.