Rangers are facing the prospect of a 3 year ban from Europe’s elite club competition following a disappointing campaign. The Scottish giants recorded the worst performance of any team since the competition began.


“Rangers are shite,” UEFA president Aleksander Čeferin told Soccer on Sunday. “This is not my opinion — it is a statement of fact. The competition is brought into disrepute if one participant lacks basic skills, such as controlling the ball and passing to a teammate.”

“A three year ban is warranted,” said the 55 year-old. “Perhaps shorter if Rangers can demonstrate that they have made strides towards being less shite. I wish them well, but the Champions League must not become a dumping ground for Scottish junk.”

“They’re absolutely shite,” added Čeferin, raising his voice and pounding the desk with his fist.