Ronaldo Sulking

Cristiano Ronaldo has again criticised Portuguese opponents after a Euro 2016 stalemate. The Madrid Galactico previously slammed Iceland following their Group F draw, and has now turned his crosshairs upon Austria.

The three-time Ballon d’Or winner denies that his own penalty miss and poor form are fuelling his criticism.


Ronaldo“Nonsense,” he told Soccer on Sunday. “This isn’t about a missed penalty. It’s about Austrians being a bunch of horse-faced, dorky scumbags. All of them. I’ve never met an Austrian who didn’t look like they wanted to be hand-fed a carrot. Do these “things” even have six-packs? They’re all horse-faced losers. Especially the women and children. Congratulations to them though, on the draw.”

“Austria reminds me of Iceland,” added the former UTD star. “Two horsey little shit holes that nobody would miss if they were nuked. And I do think we should consider nuking them. People will say I’m being petulant, and that this is sour grapes. Well those people should shut their faces or I’ll have them killed. I’m serious, I have unlimited riches for things like that.”


Marcel KollerAustrian manager Marcel Koller has accused the Portuguese of disrespect.

“It’s disappointing,” he told Soccer on Sunday. “Win, lose or draw, we shake hands after a game. For a great player like Ronaldo to later call for nuclear strikes, and the deaths of almost 8 million people? I think he’ll be disappointed when he reads back his comments.”


“No I won’t,” replied Ronaldo, when later asked to comment. “Koller can say what he wants — I don’t speak ‘horse’. The man is pasty and has no six-pack. He will be judged, when the nuclear horsepocalypse comes.”