Keane Refresher


A good team — not a great team. Expect the league to be clinched early doors

Man City

With Guardiola finally exposed as a foreign spoofer, expect City to go off a cliff and end up back where they belong in League One by 2023

Leicester City

I expect Leicester to hang on to 3rd, even if Rodgers does give me the creeps. It always feels like he’s undressing you with his eyes


Frank gets an easy ride with the English media, but I think he’s shite. Chelsea will bottle 4th and Frank will be a team captain on A League of Their Own by Christmas

Manchester UTD

Ole needs time, and I’ll thump the head off anybody who says different


Who cares?

Sheffield UTD

Who cares?


Put your house on Mourinho throwing a wobbler and blaming lockdown when everything turns to shit. I hate him


Graham Souness called Arsenal a team of son-in-laws. A flock of grannies, more like. Be lucky to scrape top 10, the spineless windbags


Who cares?

Crystal Palace

Who cares?


What in the name of Christ is Ancelotti doing at Goodison? Have they compromising photos of him wearing suspenders while fisting a pig, or something?


Looks like Steve Bruce will be given a £200 million transfer war chest once the club’s sale goes through. Only joking, the new owners will obviously sack Brucey straight after touring the facilities


Who cares?


Who cares?

West Ham

Who cares?


Who cares?


Good riddance

Aston Villa

Can you believe these cunts won the European Cup in the 80s? UEFA should take it back


What kind of a name is Pukki? Good riddance