Shaqiri knees

Xherdan Shaqiri has reportedly failed a medical with Lyon after the examination could not locate the Swiss winger’s knees. Shaqiri is keen to move on from Anfield, having struggled for game time.

Knees

Klopp“It’s confusing,” Jürgen Klopp told Soccer on Sunday. “I could have sworn Shaq had knees. How did he get through other medicals? Seems like something a doctor should notice, although probably this explains why the boy is wider than he is tall.”

“We still hope to help him find a club,” said the German. “It’s difficult, because he’s competing with players who have knees. Could the FA be doing more to help kneeless players? I don’t know, if I’m honest. Never heard of a player not having knees until now.”

“I’m not 100% convinced he has a neck either, now that I think of it,” added Klopp. “He does have a penis. It’s obviously a bit stocky, but it’s there.”