Solskjaer Summoned to Crisis Talks After Wolves Defeat

Solskjaer and Woodward

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer was summoned to crisis talks with Ed Woodward following UTD’s 2 – 1 loss to Wolves, it has been revealed. UTD have now lost three of their last four in all competitions, with reported rumblings of discontent among fans.

Words

Solskjaer presser“Ed doesn’t mince his words,” Solskjaer told Soccer on Sunday. “He said, ‘Listen Ole you geriatric little extra from Lord of the Rings, what’s with all these loses? I’ll Moyes you, you Scandinavian cuntbag.’ I didn’t appreciate the potty mouth, if I’m honest. Ed has a mouth like a fishmonger’s wife sometimes, to be fair.”

“No manager wants to be Moyes’d,” added the former striker. “I was Moyes’d by Cardiff, and it was a dark time for me and my family. Probably similar to how David Moyes felt when he was Moyes’d.”

Strong

MoyesDavid Moyes has offered words of encouragement to his Old Trafford successor.

“Ole needs to stay strong,” the Scot told Soccer on Sunday. “Nobody likes to be me’d. I didn’t enjoy it when I was me’d, and it’s not something that I’d wish on my worst enemy.”

“Which is Ed Woodward, by the way,” added Moyes. “Because he me’d me.”