Southgate Calls for Boo Boys to be Jailed

Southgate boo

Gareth Southgate has called for fans who jeer the national team to be punished under hooliganism laws. England were roundly booed for their failure to breakdown Malta during the first half of last weekend’s World Cup qualifier.

Jail

Southgate press conference“We have amazing fans,” the former Middlesbrough defender told Soccer on Sunday. “Unfortunately, 30 or 40 thousand are giving the other 40 or 50 thousand a bad name. It’s just a few tens of thousands of bad eggs. I’m not a policeman, but it seems odd that Her Majesty’s finest don’t wade in when the booing starts and baton charge the whole crowd. A few women and children will get their skulls cracked, but that’s the price of no booing.”

“It starts with booing,” added Southgate. “Then pretty soon you get idiots standing up going ‘BAWK, BAWK BAWK’ and flapping their arms like a chicken. ‘BAWK, BAWK BAWK,’ like that. Is jail too harsh for someone who screams ‘BAWK, BAWK BAWK’ at the national team? I don’t think it is, no.”

Waddle

WaddleChris Waddle believes that it is the players, not the fans, who are at fault.

“That’s a bit rich from Gareth,” the former England winger told Soccer on Sunday. “I look at the players, swanning around with their Sony Walkmen listening to Snoopack Shakur and Vanilla Hammer. They seem lifeless. At least the boy Rooney liked a pint. Who’s going to get the lads out on the lash the night before training now? Jordan Henderson? Do me a favour.”

“Chickenshit shitebags, the lot of them,” said Waddle, flapping his arms and jutting his neck in and out. “BAWK, BAWK BAWK BAWK. BAWK, BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK.”

“BAWK BAWK BAWK,” added Waddle. “BAWK BAWK BAWK.”