“You Cockney Shit”: Full Text of Lampard/Klopp Squabble

Klopp and Lampard

As transcribed by Sky Sports.

Klopp: “That’s a foul!”Klopp and Lampard

Lampard: “You ‘avin a giraffe?”

Klopp: “A what?”

Lampard: “Are you ‘avin a giraffe, you James Blunt?”

Klopp: “Speak English, you cockney shit.”

Lampard: “Do me a Cheesy Quaver you lanky Harry Potter. That was never a Colin Powell. You haven’t a Scooby Doo.”

Klopp: “Can someone get a translator? I have no idea what this guy is saying to me.”

Lampard: “Can you Adam’n’Eve this slag? A free kick? I could lose my Corn on the Cob, you Ethan Hunt.”

Klopp: “Ethan who? The Mission Impossible guy?”

Lampard: “Keep mouthing you slag. If you want Barney Rubble, I’ll give it ‘ya.”

Klopp: “I don’t understand what you’re saying, but the free kick has gone in you fat bastard.”